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Lalaki Pa Rin: Grave Misconceptions About Gays

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The evolution of LGBT issues spans a litany of complex subjects, including myths. Some people still think being gay is just about sex. But for gays, lesbians, and bis, it’s mostly about emotional intimacy and attraction —  what every human being who seeks companionship desires. Others still think to be part of the LGBT community is a choice. But science indicates your orientation is also affected by genetics. And now we have the “lalaki pa rin” misconception.

Prejudice has no place in any job. Especially if it’s your job to bring people to justice.

So imagine the gravity of the situation when the Makati Police Chief Col. Harold Depositar claimed that gays are “lalaki pa rin,” referring to the gay suspects in the Christine Dacera case. The implication? Gays, once under the influence of alcohol and drugs, give in to male instincts that drive them to desire — and rape — women.

So many layers of wrong to unpack.

Do Gays Want Women When They’re Drunk?

People of any gender could be sexual predators, but to proclaim gay men automatically revert to machismo when intoxicated is a misstatement. Photo by Tobias Tullius on Unsplash

Nevermind that the gay suspects have a clear sexual orientation. The State authorities have proclaimed: gays at the core are nothing but men, and men are led by nothing but carnal urges. They’ve dismissed the probable gender nuances of the case and declared it “solved.” Gays, turn yourselves in, or we will hunt you down.

But we all know that people are not divided into clean categories of “man” and “woman.”

The SOGIE spectrum is rich and diverse, and declaring that gays are “still men” is dismissing decades of gender conversation. Why are we backsliding to heteronormativity?

Yes, it’s probable for people across the gender spectrum to be sexual predators. But to say that gays will automatically revert to machismo when drunk and high is calloused.

Have they never seen a drunk gay before?

The fun part is that no one agrees. Celebrity designer Rajo Laurel clapped back:

So did Babaylanes, Inc., the alumni organization of its counterpart LGBT student org, UP Babaylan.

And so did thousands of people. This ain’t it, chief.

Is Rape the Default of the Male Instinct?

That some people think men will automatically force themselves on women when drunk could also be relevant to the discussion about victim blaming; don’t wear anything revealing or tight when going out with guys, watch your drink all night, so no one spikes it, and so on and so forth. Photo by Alexander Popov on Unsplash

So if gays are “lalaki pa rin,” do they mean to say that men are, at the core, sexual predators? That somebody who is a “man” is automatically capable of rape-slay?

They’re not just saying that gays become attracted to women when they get drunk. They’re also implying that gays can and will dismiss consent when they get drunk. Being attracted to women and dismissing consent are two different things.

But I guess for the chief, they’re one and the same.

Will Christine Ever Get Rest?

There are so many things to be frustrated about in this case. My biggest regret is that Christine was deprived of privacy, and the public was fed with details of her private life. Her death was feasted on, thanks to a combination of police-sanctioned publicity and media scrutiny. If this was an attempt to divert our attention from other issues, it worked.

But if this was an attempt to showcase the might of the PNP, it failed. Spectacularly.

Despite earlier claims that it was a rape-slay case, recent police findings revealed there were no drugs involved, and that she died a natural death. And PNP chief Debold Sinas (who himself violated quarantine protocols for his famous mañanita) has approved the recommendation to sack four police officials, including Col. Depositar for mishandling the Dacera case.

We’re just here hoping that the case be closed, so Christine gets the peace she deserves.

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