It’s no secret that men and women are different. There’s an endless list of biological factors and gender issues at play. But when it comes down to relationships, there’s one difference that sticks out – that men and women deal with problems differently.
Women tend to overthink or get too absorbed in their emotions, and men would often deny that there is a problem unless there’s concrete evidence.
I’ve been caught up with this dilemma (and so have most of my female friends) quite a lot to tell you that it’s real. And to support that claim, here’s a list of the many things men in relationships hold onto as “truths.”
That they’re not gaining weight. They’re aiming for the “dad bod” because it’s trendy
Men and women put on extra pounds when they settle into a relationship. It’s nothing new. After all, meals are part of building a relationship, from first dates to pizza nights while binge-watching Netflix. This is even more common among couples who cohabitate. There’s a sense of security and no competition, so you have less incentive to watch what you eat.
But your boyfriend won’t tell you he’s gaining weight because he’s comfortable. He’d come up with some other excuse to not go to the gym, like “memberships are too expensive, I’d rather spend it on our dates.” It’s cute and sweet and all, but they don’t acknowledge the fact that they’re compromising their health, which leads us to our next point that men deny.
That their cholesterol is high — and “high” is always a good thing
Men tend to have higher cholesterol levels than women. But even a mountain of medical evidence won’t stop your boyfriend, husband, or dad from eating that plate-full of lechon, oil-drenched sisig, or tub of ice cream. “Minsan lang naman!” is even their favorite excuse, then they snack on grapes, nuts, or wine later to wash off the guilt.
That their hair isn’t thinning — it’s just going to different places
Hair loss is a serious and widespread issue for men, but they’ll only believe it when they actually see clumps of hair in the shower drain or a balding patch. Dove Men+Care shares that hundreds of dermatologists found out men suffer more from hair loss than women. Despite that, men would groom their hair aggressively, which experts in the poll claim to be the leading stressor to hair fall.
But they won’t believe you if you say eating protein-rich food or washing with mild shampoo and conditioner will help prevent balding. And when the problem gets worse, they’d either try to conceal it or turn to invasive and expensive treatments to reverse the irreversible.
That they’re as mushy and needy as their partners
It’s not just women who are cunning and calculating. When you’re in the dating phase, expect a guy to treat you like you’re invisible and replaceable. A guy in a committed relationship would act like he’s not head-over-heels in love with his S.O., especially in front of his bros. But when it’s just the two of them, the walls crumble, and he goes back to being the marshmallow that he truly is.
That it’s their fault why the relationship is falling apart
It’s the classic recipe to every romcom we love: boy meets girl, boy and girl become a couple, boy takes girl for granted, girl walks away, moves on, and becomes happy with someone else, boy regrets everything and begs for girl to come back. This happens quite a lot in real life, too.
Men don’t or refuse to see that they’re part of the problem. It will only sink in when it’s already too late.
That they need help with directions because Columbus didn’t need Waze to discover America
Men are naturally better navigators than women. It has something to do with testosterone, reveals a study from the University of Illinois researchers. Results show that even if females roamed just as much as men, men would still be better at finding their way. Because of this well-attested ability that all men should have, they tend to refrain from asking for directions. They’d rather get lost and drive aimlessly than accept that their spatial abilities are getting dull.
That they need professional help fixing things in the house because Mr. Fix It is a guy for a reason
We love our dads, boyfriends, and male friends for being resourceful and physically strong. But sometimes, it’s best to leave the plumbing problems or short circuits to the pros. That’s not easy for them to realize that, though. They’d rather risk breaking their backs to prove that they can lift a heavy object or fix the leaky roof than face the embarrassment of not living up to their ancient code of manhood.
That they go out with friends because women don’t think time away from the relationship is a legitimate need
We all lie, that’s a given. Some men lie to preserve a relationship, while others do it to avoid confrontation. Your bae won’t tell you he’s going to a bar with his bros, so you don’t overthink or wage war the next morning for his alleged infidelity. So instead of going through that, they’d say they’re having dinner with family or anything that won’t invoke suspicion instead. Clever.
That a problem is serious, unless it blows out of proportion
I’ve encountered a lot of men who have been warned of a storm coming but still ignored the warnings. When faced with a problem, women tend to be the initiators, while men stay passive and reactive. They seldom snap into activity when it’s called for, to the extent that you start questioning your sense of reality. So expect your S.O. to only acknowledge how bad a storm is when your roof is already blown away by the wind.
Relationships take a lot of work. If you’re lucky enough to be in one, given today’s ambiguous dating culture, a huge chunk of it goes to working out these differences and polishing the rough edges.
But don’t get easily frustrated if your S.O. takes a while to kick these habits. You can’t expect him to see the world the same way you do. Focus instead on how you can help him deal with problems.
Start small; you can strengthen your bond and his tresses with Dove Men+Care’s Strengthening Shampoo. Its mild formulation is infused with caffeine and Trichazole Actives to help reduce hair fall and keep your man’s mane healthy and strong.